Facing Forty Upside Down

How to Bike in the Rain: With 32K Friends! TD Five Boro Bike Tour Team #SomeNerve 2016 Recap 6

How to Bike in the Rain: With 32K Friends! TD Five Boro Bike Tour Team #SomeNerve 2016 Recap

Posted by on May 2, 2016 in Bicycling, Events, exercise, facing fears, Facing Forty Upside Down, fitness, Some Nerve, Trying new things

When the weather report for the 42-mile TD Five Boro Bike Tour 2016 said “a total washout – rain all day and temperatures in the 40s” I was not happy. I have somehow, through training for 3 5-Boros and 3 triathlons since learning to bike 2 years ago with Bike New York Adult Beginner classes, managed to avoid cycling long distances in the rain. The thought of biking on wet and slippery roads while getting hypothermia made me want to fake a fever and call the whole thing off. But the 5 Boro is RAIN OR SHINE, my team is called Team #SomeNerve (WHY? WHY didn’t I call it Team #SOMEFAIRWEATHERNERVE?), and despite some cancellations a great number of BRAVE teammates checked in to say “I’M STILL IN!” So I went to work figuring out how best to weather the weather. I queried experts at Red Beard Bikes, Liv Cycling, Hastings Velo, and the fine athletes at the Women for Tri Facebook Group. Our hard earned advice: * Dress appropriately – Anti fog sunglasses and/or a visor under your helmet. WATERPROOF gloves, rain jacket, rain pants. In my case, “Water Resistant” Gloves = “Water Becomes Irresistible at about Mile 15” and Your Hands Will be Wet and Frozen. Wool (or...

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What Young Artists Need 7

What Young Artists Need

Posted by on Apr 13, 2016 in Facing Forty Upside Down, parenting

When we adopted G and R one of the most fun things to imagine was what innate talents they might have. Unbound by expectations based on DNA, we’ve had the fun of being surprised again and again: G’s love of martial arts and science, for example, or R’s mad parkour skills and her cool fashion sensibility. Kent and I aren’t naturally good at any of that – but look at them go! For every hit, of course there are lots of misses, hobbies tried and dropped soon after. So when we signed up spur of the moment for an open studio painting session with muralist Kim Ray at Mountain Painters and Artisans Gallery in Londonderry, VT we knew it could go any which way. Fifteen year old G hasn’t painted since she was a toddler, so No pressure, honey, just give it a try. She chose to paint our dog, Mochi. Two hours later, she’d created this: WHOA! AMAZING! THAT’S MOCHI! Friends cried. “Can she paint my tortoise Minnie?” bestselling novelist Caroline Leavitt asked via Facebook. “I’ll pay her.”  G’s second pet portrait would be her first commissioned piece! G went to work. She asked Caroline all about Minnie. She researched Vietnamese Jagged Shell Tortoises. She tried to channel...

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Spring = Bike Tune Up Time! 1

Spring = Bike Tune Up Time!

Posted by on Apr 6, 2016 in Bicycling, exercise, Facing Forty Upside Down

Spring is springing (which in NY apparently means blooming flowers, freezing temps, and snow!) and that means…bike tune up time! Yesterday, I brought my purple Giant back to the mother ship, Redbeard Bikes in Brooklyn, where I was told I wore my chain out and needed a new one – not bad for a 45 year old newbie!  After 2 Five Boro Bike Tours, the Discover Hudson Valley Ride, the Tour de Bronx, 3 triathlons and countless training miles – all within 2 years of learning to ride – I am proud to have broken my bike in.  “Did you ever imagine you’d be leading rides,” Kasia Nikhamina (co-owner of Redbeard, with her husband Ilya) asked, when I told her I needed the tune up in time for a Team #SomeNerve training ride this week. We both laughed, remembering how I couldn’t ride around the block when I bought this bike 2 years ago (See How to Buy a Bike & Survive Your First Test Ride). Kasia is warm and encouraging and makes everyone, and especially women, feel welcome in the store and capable on wheels. I will always be grateful to her for getting me up to speed (ha!). Redbeard is running some great events coming up, including “How to Fix...

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Fear of Writing: Family Memoir 0

Fear of Writing: Family Memoir

Posted by on Mar 23, 2016 in Facing Forty Upside Down

I recently had the honor of being a guest author at Linda Lowen‘s non-fiction class at the Downtown Writers Center of the YMCA of Greater Syracuse (via FaceTime chat) and I enjoyed their questions so much I thought I’d share some of the discussion here with all of you. The class, “Why You Need Some Nerve to Write,” looked at Some Nerve and the fear of failure. The students’ pointed questions about the fear of exposure that comes with “going public” with oneself (and especially with family stories) is at the heart of what most of us are afraid of in life – being rejected, hurting our loved ones – and that writers feel on a sometimes seemingly unbearable scale. Telling our stories is always optional, so why risk it? And what is the cost of not telling our stories at all? I’ve paraphrased (i.e., shortened, made more coherent) my answers for this blog.  For a person who started out so very fearful, how did you get the nerve to put yourself out there in the public eye, or was that never a problem? Ha! I wrote an entire book about my countless fears, of course I was afraid of putting myself out there! I still am, and I suspect part...

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NEXT ACTS: A Some Nerve Workshop for Reinventing Moms 0

NEXT ACTS: A Some Nerve Workshop for Reinventing Moms

Posted by on Feb 2, 2016 in Courage, Events, facing fears, Facing Forty Upside Down, Fear of Change, parenting, Some Nerve, Trying new things

If there’s one thing I know, it’s what it feels like to be a reinventing mom. It takes a special kind of courage to set new goals after years of focused parenting and to achieve them while balancing the needs of others. I can’t wait to lead a Some Nerve workshop especially for moms: Friday, February 26 9 am – 12 noon Purpl 52 Main Street Hastings on Hudson, NY 10706 $68 Register Here Workshop description below – please share with the moms in your life – and if you’re a mom looking for more, I hope to see you there! NEXT ACTS: A Some Nerve Workshop for Reinventing Moms Once the kids are in school it’s mom’s turn to figure out “What’s next for me?”  Career change? Get fit? Clear clutter? Write a book? Find my true self? Ack! If the thought of a new direction (or finally tackling long held goals) is a little…er, scary, then join us for a special workshop with Patty Chang Anker, author of SOME NERVE: Lessons Learned While Becoming Brave (“Mom Must Read,” Parents Magazine), and discover how to de-escalate fear’s power and make your next act the greatest it can be. We’ll address self-doubt and fear of failure, challenge old habits and create new ways of thinking. We’ll identify...

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Don’t Think, Just Go: Facing 40 with a Spartan Race & America’s Got Talent – A Guest Post by @Miradorable 4

Don’t Think, Just Go: Facing 40 with a Spartan Race & America’s Got Talent – A Guest Post by @Miradorable

Posted by on Jan 27, 2016 in Asian American, exercise, facing fears, Facing Forty Upside Down, fitness, running, Trying new things

When I first met Karlene at an Asian Women in Business event, she seemed perfectly normal.  She’d ventured out in the Polar Vortex to see me speak about Some Nerve; I told her she seemed plenty brave already. I had no idea! It turns out she has an amazing “Facing Forty Upside Down” story, one that inspired me to try triathlon. I asked her to share it in a guest blog – I can’t wait to see what sparks she lights in YOU!  DON’T THINK, JUST GO Guest blog by Karleen Mirador Haines (@Miradorable) After you turn 27 or 28 when someone asks how old you are, you tend to forget. On my 39th birthday I was jolted, suddenly reminded: Oh crap, that means I’m “turning 40”. I moped for a bit, but quickly remembered some of the great things that kept me feeling young. Young enough to forget that the sun was setting, that my wrinkles were deepening, that I’d have to stock up on hair dye. Things like: running around to clean up after my husband, being a busy executive at a non-profit and an adjunct professor at the local college, having fun friends, recently losing some weight and parenting my 4 year old son. He embodied...

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